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These Padres managerial candidates are terrible

What the hell is this crap?

MLB: Los Angeles Angels at Oakland Athletics
Are you kidding me?
Stan Szeto-USA TODAY Sports

Hi there! I’d like to direct you to a very odd article that I was reading earlier today.

It’s a weird article! I didn’t even finish reading it (although I think I finished the part where Andy Green was Moses), but I stuck in there long enough to see these tweets that were embedded in the post:

Good gravy, that’s a pretty terrible list. Especially the one put out there by Acee. Let’s play this out like a Twitter meme, shall we?

Stop talking shit about Acee’s managerial candidates

Bruce Bochy is RETIRED

Mike Scoscia is BUD BLACK REDUX

Moises Alou

Ron Washington has BAGGAGE

Mark Loretta is INEXPERIENCED

Again, I can’t stress enough that the best candidate on this list is a guy that has never managed and retired from baseball a decade ago. They’d literally be signing him off the front porch. I wonder if he can name five players on the Padres roster. The only reason Alou beats out Loretta (who also retired a decade ago and has never managed) is that his father was a pretty good manager, so he probably has some decent insight there.

Still, not a good list!

Back to the article I barely read for a second...

San Diego has gone 274-366 under Green, and they’ll probably finish somewhere around 72-90 this season. Despite the win-loss record, this will be one of the most attractive managerial jobs to open up in recent memory. With Fernando Tatís, Jr., Manny Machado, Chris Paddack, and about 527 other super talented young players above and below deck, the Padres are poised to become the next Astros or Cubs.

An attractive managerial job should get you a good manager, or at least a pretty exciting list of managerial candidates, right?

At least Dennis Lin’s list included Rod Barajas (44 years old, beloved in the clubhouse, with some managerial experience!) and two World Series winners in Joe Maddon and Joe Girardi.

Why are the San Diego Padres, now in a position where they could honestly get almost any free agent manager out there, playing footsy with guys that are either retired or completely lacking in any sort of experience? What has them convinced that Alou or Loretta could do the job?

Anyway, this should be the San Diego Padres’ shot. The job has never been more attractive. They should find the best possible young-ish candidate and sign him to a long-term contract. Give him the keys to the clubhouse and let him run the team his way. Reclaim what you had with Bruce Bochy 20 years ago, but don’t do it with current day Bruce Bochy.

For Christ’s Moses’ sake.