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Padres all-time Earth Day team

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USA TODAY Sports

Every Christmas or 4/20, someone invariably constructs a team of guys with names like Steve Christmas and Jung Bong, so since it's Earth Day I thought "What the heck? My little garbagebrain can't think of anything better to write about" and put together the Padres' all-time Earth Day team.

C- Pete LaForest
1B- Mike Ivie
2B- Craig Stansberry
SS- Khalil Greene
3B- Jeff Gardner
LF- Billy Bean
CF- Reggie Sanders
RF- Phil Plantier

SP- Chan Ho Park
SP- Woody Williams
SP- Brian Meadows
SP- Clay Kirby
SP- Burch Smith

RP- Dave Eiland
RP- Shawn Hill
RP- Cla Meredith
RP- Jason Middlebrook
RP- Steve Reed
RP- Ricky Stone

Some of these were a bit of a stretch ("The stansberries taste like stansberries!") but nobody else at second base, center field, or right field even came close so I had to settle for guys with stuff like 'sand' and 'plant' in their names.

There, now that I've done my part for Earth Day, I can go back using hairspray and throwing cigarette butts on the ground.*

*Kidding! I don't do either of those things. Please don't send me angry emails.