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Who should be the Padres next bench coach?

Christopher Hanewinckel-US PRESSWIRE

I started this post as a plea that the Padres hire Joey Cora to fill the seat in the dugout next to Bud Black that was vacated when the Cubs yoinked our bench coach Rick Renteria to be their next manager. Oh, I had the whole stupid thing mapped out. I started with a "While it's improbable..." and launched into the reasons that Joey would be a great fit. But let's get real. No matter what a great baseball mind he is, the Padres aren't going to hire some outsider with no ties to Bud Black or Josh Byrnes who would be something of a lame duck anyway because he'll be in the mix for managerial jobs next offseason or even sooner. That, and I can't just turn every post I do here into Coraporn, so I deleted everything I wrote and started from scratch.

Dave Roberts is the logical choice, right? If I were a gambling man (read: if I didn't spend all of my disposable cashflow on booze and could afford to fund even more self-destructive behavior) I'd bet on that happening. But then we'd have to get another first base coach, but I guess that's cool because then I can hammer out another blog post that practically writes itself.

Another name that came to mind was Mark Kotsay since he was practically a coach last year anyway but I quickly dismissed it because I can't imagine why he would stop playing just to immediately jump right back into the season-long grind. If I were him I would have retired the day I/he married Jamie and never left the house. There is no way that sitting around talking about defensive shifts could sound more appealing than the opportunity to make sweet, sweet love to his beautiful beloved on the regular.

Who do you guys think should be in the mix for the job?