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Happiness Project: Get Yourself Some Context

Doug Pensinger - Getty Images

So I have nothing good to write about right now. Off the top of my head, I'm pretty well settled into looking forward to 2013, but that leaves me with quite a bit of time wherein I will still need to be satisfying my baseball fix in one way or another.

I looked to the calendar for the happiness project written so many months ago and this is what I had put down for September.

September: Get some context

  • Read up on teams who are currently in last place
  • Sit in on an opponents open thread in a non-trolling manner

Just to clarify, I didn't expect us to be in last place at this point in the season, but I also didn't expect us to be on the way to the postseason. I also know that people look out for number one and things that are "out of sight" or typically "out of mind". We all do it. San Diego becomes the center of the universe and the Padres are the only team that exists. Every other team is out there to provide various benchmarks to our favorite team, but for the most part, we don't look at those other teams in a truly critical manner. We just decide if we want to show something off about our team and make a direct comparison to the worst aspect of another person's team. Or vice versa... We decide that we want to critique our team and point to somebody else and say, "Why can't we be like that?"

So for September, what I wanted to do was take a look at the teams that are in last place and put us in proper context. If you were disappointed with this season, then imagine what the fans in those other places are feeling.

The teams currently in last place:

Just look at that list and soak it in. No, I'm not sure what we were all supposed to be feeling. This is supposed to make us happy, but not in a gloating schadenfreude sort of way. Rather a "be thankful for what you have" sort of way. Like... At least we aren't Canadian.

Or ummm... Not only is it hot in Houston, the ocean is 50 miles away.

Maybe you'd get more out of it than me. All's I'm saying is that in the grand scheme of things, the Padres are doing pretty well. Sure, there are haters out there who will point out all the random stuff that's wrong with the Padres and the cable deal and all that, but let's be honest. Those guys are idiots. Don't listen to them. They don't actually live in San Diego and probably cry when they masturbate.

Instead, stay true to yourself and be grounded and try not to say stuff like, "There's always next year." Instead, say stuff like, "The Padres are really good. Sure they started off bad, and if you were to just watch one random game, maybe you wouldn't be able to tell, but if you really became a fan, you'd find a lot to root for. We're much closer to being great than Seattle/Cleveland/Toronto/Colorado/Houston/Miami. Not that they aren't trying. Just that it's tough."

And then people will slowly get it in their heads, "Man... Real die hard Padres Fan is super classy. I should go to a game."

Wouldn't that be rad?