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Padres lose to Marlins, 4-1

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There are many ways to draw naked cartoon characters into this photo.
There are many ways to draw naked cartoon characters into this photo.


Final - 5.5.2012 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 R H E
Miami Marlins 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 2 1 4 11 0
San Diego Padres 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 5 0
WP: Mark Buehrle (2 - 4)
LP: Clayton Richard (1 - 4)

Complete Coverage >


Had the kids with us at the game last night and they lasted a solid 6 innings, at which point we headed over to the playground at the Park in the Park. Playground = Impossible to watch the game.

So I'll tell you what I saw.

I saw a pretty decent game that went very quickly what with Clayton Richard and Mark Buehrle both pitching as if they had someplace else to be. I saw some OK defense and a little bit of timely hitting, but not timely enough. I saw a really cool looking yellow Padres throwback shirt and a brown hoody that I'm gonna ask for as a present for whatever holiday comes next. aAt the playground and I watched Elliott pretend to be a barista, serving coffee to some three year old blonde, and Max running around a tree before stopping and making a poop face.

Things I learned:

  • Clayton Richard does not know how to throw the ball to first base. On two almost back to back occasions, after fielding balls hit to him, he sent bounce passes over to Yonder Alonso.
  • Yonder Alonso really owns that title of Doubles Machine.
  • Jason Bartlett really is just not worth much of anything at all anymore. I'm surprised he's in the lineup ever.
  • This is especially sad because I've been defending Bartlett as a fellow countryman and now I've been forced to turn on the country of my ancestors. Bartlett is shit.
  • The least Jason Bartlett could do is shave. If he's going to play like an 8 year old girl that's more into dolls than sports, he should have facial hair like an 8 year old girl that's more into dolls than sports.
  • Dale Thayer has a really good mustache.

This was a real disappointing loss after the third inning of last night's game, at which point I thought we had a shot at sweeping this overpaid, overhyped circus from Miami.