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Gaslamp Baller's MLB Teams We Hate

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We got a bunch of responses and here are the results of our ongoing team hatred rankings. I've finally decided to publish them. Here they are in order of most hated to least hated along with my notes:

  1. Dodgers
  2. Yankees
  3. Red Sox
  4. Giants
  5. Rockies

The Dodgers isn't a surprise to me and I think Yankees and Red Sox going 2 and 3 is due to a combination of disgust of east coast bias, annoying Yankee and Red Sox fans and jealousy.

I think as the years continue and the Rockes and Padres continue to be more consistently competitive within the division, we'll see the Rockies edge themselves into the top 3. Personally, I like the idea of a Mile High vs Sea Level rivalry as much as or more than SoCal vs NoCal, SD vs LA (the "Garvey Cup" I call it), or Beach vs Desert. It's very much a nice "new school" rivalry.

  1. Diamondbacks
  2. Cardinals
  3. Cubs
  4. Phillies
  5. Mets

The Diamondbacks at 6 is interesting to me. Personally, I hate the Diamondbacks more than the Giants, but maybe this is a result of a couple of uncompetitive seasons in a row from our Zonie friends. The Cardinals over the Cubs I can kinda understand just because the Cardinals have owned us in the postseason, but let's be honest, in general a bad Cubs fan is maybe a good 11 times worse than a bad Cardinals fan. Think Smug and Whiny vs Just Smug. The Phillies are up there partly out of jealousy that they're so good these days, mostly out of hatred for Jayson Werth (bitch). Everybody hates the Mets because David Wright is ugly.

  1. Braves
  2. Mariners
  3. Athletics
  4. White Sox
  5. Angels

Personally, I root quietly for the Braves since Brooks is on the team, while also hoping that they fail while Brooks isn't in the game so that Brooks has a better chance of getting in the game. The Mariners at TWELVE is inexcusable. I expect our readership to be smarter than this. The Mariners are our NATURAL RIVALS. Pacific Northwest vs Baja. Come on, people. When I was little, I really liked the A's so personally, I don't know what anybody would have against them. I know JBox hates them.

Interestingly, the Angels are a team that we can really statistically agree belongs right in the middle of our hatred. It's like the shared annoyance with the Dodgers combined with not really liking the team that's closest to your team. Padres fans don't know what to do with the Angels.

  1. Twins
  2. Royals
  3. Rays
  4. Rangers
  5. Tigers

And after 15 is where we start approaching Not-As-Much-Hate territory. I have nothing to say about any of these teams. I know they're all in the AL. I liked Kirby Puckett when he was playing. I really liked Bo Jackson. The Rays were historically the Yankees' bitches/extended farm team, so I could see them being bumped up a bit. Until just now I forgot the Rangers existed and the Tigers beat us in the World Series like forever ago and aren't super good any more.

  1. Nationals
  2. Marlins
  3. Orioles
  4. Indians
  5. Brewers

These five are also kinda weird. More AL teams that I'm super indifferent to, but a few NL teams in there as well. I'm surprised people can't find it in their hearts to be annoyed with the Brewers at all considering they kidnapped Tony Gwynn Jr. and forced Trevor Hoffman away from San Diego, but hey... Whatever floats your boat.

  1. Astros
  2. Padres
  3. Blue Jays
  4. Pirates
  5. Reds

And then finally, the least hated teams in baseball. I'm really surprised that the Astros are this far down on the list. I also don't blame people necessarily for having little bits of hate for the Padres. I myself would rank teams that I forget about on a daily basis as having less of my hate than the Padres. However, I'm a little surprised that the Reds would be down at the very bottom of the list considering Joe Morgan. Have you people no sense of history and the evil that results thereof? The Reds, man. Joe Morgan. Ugh.