2008 Gaslamp Ball Predictions

As much as I've enjoyed reading jbox's "2008 Padres Predictions" post, I'm not one who's big on making predictions for my favorite teams. I have a difficult time keeping a good balance of using my heart and my head to make a fair judgement. It's mostly that...and the fact that I'm just not good at it.  What I do love about jbox's that it sparked tons of opinions and creativity.

So, piggybacking on his idea...I've come up with some of my own predictions...GLB style. Please add your own. I know I've forgotten some important GLBers and I know I've missed some easy ones that will pop into my head later.

You'll note that I left myself off this list. Please show no mercy...I think I've earned that. 


2008 Gaslamp Ball Predictions 

Christina:  Noting that Mike Piazza still hasn’t been signed by a team, Christina will offer him a minor-league deal to do what she calls “odd-jobs around the house” while Alex is at school.


matto619:  Will pick one month of the season to grow a beard…during that month the Padres will win 70% of their games.


wiggins4ever:  At some point in the season, wiggins will disappear for a while. This period will be “no less than 30 days and no more than 45 days”.


wiggins Mom:  Will write one Fanpost. It will establish a new record for Fanpost recs.


sdsuaztec4: Will bring down his fantasy baseball team with Phantom because of his insistence on keeping Curt Schilling on the roster despite the fact that he’s on the DL.


Winfield’s Ghost: Continues to be the most-underrated member of the GLB.    


RBS – Will catch at least two foul balls…all while wearing a Mike Scioscia jersey.


Phantom – Will finally get enough booze in him, that late in an open thread of a 4 for 4 night by Greeney, will admit that he has a tattoo of a heart with “Khalil” in the middle of it on his right ass cheek.


TTG – No less than 117 times will TTG remind us why Joey Cora should have been chosen to lead the Padres instead of Harry.


padparazzi – Hired by TMZ.  


SammyG – Will enjoy at least one pint of every micro-brew brewed in the state of California before the All-Star break.


Dalton (The artist formerly known as NYCPadre) – Will spend the night of Tuesday, June 17th in a jail cell for attacking Billy Crystal with a miniature souvenir baseball bat.


17YOGP – Two words: Restraining Order.


Demoira – Will be much more careful when walking in heels with a blood alcohol level over three times the legal limit.


DodgerBlueBalls – Will show up in an open thread in a game where we are racking Uncle Barry and the Giants.  He’ll say something intelligent and funny…making us think he’s not such a bad guy after all.


DodgerBlueBalls – Will show up in an open thread in a game where Nomar just hit a 3-run homerun off of Cla and say something that will remind us why we hate Dodger fans with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns.  


Wonko – Will be banned from the GLB by late May.


Geoff – Will stop by in the middle of an intense discussion with a comment that is short, wise and poignant…much like an old Indian Chief. This will only confuse the majority of us.


TheGrandHatching – At just the perfect moment, will drop a movie quote so fitting and hilarious, it will seem that the line was written expressly for the GLB. This will pop into my head at random times over the next week and I will giggle like a little girl with a new Care Bear.


JBRO – Upon reading another one of jbox’s “Oh, how I miss my best friend Dex” posts, JBRO will post the lyrics to some random power ballad from an 80’s band. I hope it will be REO Speedwagon.


padresgirlforlife44 – Finally jumps the rail at Petco and tackles Jake, planting 23 kisses on him before Petco Park security removes her from his “hot bod”.


osbug – Designs a killer “Gey for Gerut” logo and markets it on Café Press. I buy a t-shirt, sweatshirt, pin, coffee mug and a speedo bearing the logo.  


thepadfather – Will be the only one who can truly keep TTG in line.


sdgaucho – After taking batting practice at Petco for the 37th time…finally gets a roster spot with the Lake Elsinore Storm.  He is released after failing his first steroid test.


freelunch - Will make totally inappropriate comments and then feign innocence when she gets called on them. These comments will excite sdsuaztec4 to no end.


sqrunt – Will post some sweet pics.  


elan – Will continue to have his comments randomly deleted…not because he mentions his “peen”…but because it makes jbox happy.


California Penal – Goes on the GLB DL after being beaten up by a former Marine at Petco during a Sunday game for saying that he can’t believe the Padres are wearing “those f**king camo unis AGAIN.”


TheVinylCrocodile – Picks an avatar that totally sends “the wrong message”.


motoole – Finally admits she that she actually finds me charming and quite dashing.


fairweather – Due to a lack of sleep won’t even know the Padres season has started until late April.


ABY - Will make a comment that only she has any idea as to what the hell she’s talking about…but will, for some reason, still make us all laugh.


TheRevRun – Won’t be here nearly as much as we’d like.


SmoothJazzMan – Will show up and pretend like he’s never insulted any of us or vowed to never post on the GLB ever again.


kev – Starts exactly ONE open thread. Padres win. His season ends at 1.000.


JonnyDub – Breaks up at least two no-hitters.


jbox – In the midst of a Padre losing streak, will write a long post placing the blame  of the skid entirely on Clay Hensley, Dex’s move to the east coast, Jonny Dub’s cats, the lack of an aquarium in the outfield wall at Petco Park…and most of all…the Chinese.  


Dex – The Padres win the 2008 World Series in six games over the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, California of the United States of America. Four words, baby! “PANT FULL OF BONE!!!!!” 

This FanPost was written by a member of the Gaslamp Ball community and does not necessarily reflect the views of the Gaslamp Ball staff or SB Nation.