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I've just improved the classic baseball field with very little thought for safety

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Can you believe that I came up with these great ideas while barely even trying?  It's true. 

The field is divided into pie segments and then they alternate well groomed field and deep grass and sand.  Then there is a moat in the middle of the outfield filled with the city's run-off water and the rare river shark and alligator.  There will be two wild fires burning out of control in the corners of the outfield and moguls placed randomly.  Also there are spiders to the left of second base.