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Open Thread, 6/22: Padres vs Red Socks

So, in comes Boston with their George Steinbrenner financed super team. If you haven't made it out to the ballpark yet, here are some good comebacks/heckles to use on unsuspecting Boston fans just to completely infuriate them.

  • When Boston Fan tries to insult the Padres to you, stare at him blankly for a few seconds and then say that you can't understand him through his "thick and frankly, ridiculous accent".

  • Tell Boston Fan that the only reason they have a good team is because Steinbrenner overpays for talent. When they tell you that Steinbrenner's not the owner, tell them, "I actually knew that, but you on the other hand are still spelling 'socks' wrong."

  • Ask Boston Fan, "What were you eating under there?" When they reply, "Under where?" Tell them, "You're disgusting, Boston Fan. What kind of animal eats their underwears?"

  • Say this to your neighbor matter-of-factly, but loud enough for nearby Boston Fan to hear, "I heard that Dice-K actually speaks perfect english... He just can't understand people in Boston because of their thick and frankly, ridiculous accents."

  • "So, how bout them Celtics? Good idea to tank the season. Just like Boston Fan... Always getting things backwards."

  • Chant 1918 and when they try to tell you that they won in 2004, ask them if they are sure and tell them that you don't remember that.

  • (This one requires a friend) When Boston Fan says something in their thick and ridiculous accent, have your friend ask you, "What did he say?" And your reply will be, "I think he said that Cheers is filmed before a live studio audience."
Also... You didn't hear this from me... Well timed peanut shells.