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Month of May Beard 2: The Dangers of Growing a Beard

I got an update from matto619 regarding his Month of May Beard.

The beard has had some interesting side effects:

Here's pic #2. All in all I am quite pleased, considering it is only May 7th. Having a beard, or at least attempting to have one, has caused quite a stir in my life. For one thing, I have turned into the second coming of Narcissus. I cannot stop looking at my damn reflection. In the bathroom, in the elevator, in my car, at the gym. This reminds of something else: the women. I'm definitely attracting a lot more attention from them. For example, yesterday I was leaving the gym and had to give my validation to the parking attendant, who was a nice-looking gal. She seriously was checking me out for a good 10 seconds, then got flustered and laughed a little bit before finally raising the gate to let me go. It was pretty awesome.

Other thoughts:
- I don't get carded when I buy booze anymore.
- One small disappointment: the moustache. He needs to start showing up.
- Most importantly: Padres are 4-1 for the month.
It's true. The beard is sexy. I find myself running my finger slowly down my laptop screen while biting my lower lip and half grunting, "Mmph! You don't even know! Mmph!" (True story... That's what Kev did at his wedding during the first dance with his new bride.)

In honor of matto619: