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Jake is phat man

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Hit the game yesterday. The ol' business man special. Glad I did too, because it was a great performance by one Jake J. Peavy. Peavy matched his personal best 13 strike outs. He was mowing down batters, like Luke Yoder mows the lawn at Petco. That wasn't enough for ol' Jake though, he had to hit too. He hit a double over the head of the center fielder and an infield single. What more could you ask of him? He put on a show yesterday. The crowd was getting behind him on every pitch towards the end, practically begging him for more strike outs. It's a shame Bochy decided to take him out. Especially since "Cowcat" aka Dewon Brazelton was trying to give away the game.

Talked to former Pad Squad Steph for awhile and tried to convince her that I should be hired as a Pad Squad consultant. I told her I would revolutionize the squad. Only half jokingly I told her my first order of business would be to fire all the male Pad Squadders. It's hard to talk to the Pad Squadders if their "boyfriends" are standing right there, that's all I'm saying. She told me that the guys were necessary for holding the water balloon launchers. I told her they just need more beefy girls. I won't tell you what she said in response to that.

Dex and I are going to be Pad Squadders for a day sometime this season. I'm working on that. We are going to wear the shortest booty shorts, it's not even gonna be remotely civilized.