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Winter Meetings and Departings Haiku

Padres are busy like bumblebees. Maybe we ought to round everything up a little bit. In haiku form? Do we even dare? On top of that, I'm gonna see if I can't do this from memory without looking at the rest of the site or any other sites.

I know this sounds like a completely unproductive way of doing this, but nobody ever accused us of being productive. I'll hide this with a jump if you don't want to mess with it. (And I wouldn't blame you if you didn't.)

loretta departs
for boston and leaves us with
doug mirabelli

At least now we don't have to explain the whole Lowrider entrance music to first time Petco visitors. And LoFans, the dude wasn't going to retire here. It had to happen eventually.

sean burroughs and his
low slugging percentage is
now in tampa bay

And in exchange, we pick up Dewon Brazelton. Did I get the name right? Hope I did.

No longer do we have to worry about Burroughs and his refusual to swing for extra bases. No longer do we have to wonder what the hell is going on with his choice of mariachi polka for entrance music.

mark sweeney's bald head
departs for san francisco
good bye big league hair

With Sweeney's departure the ladies of Gaslamp Ball and the fans of Show Your Pelo despair.

do you hear that sound?
coming from the depths of hell?
bong bong bong bong bong bong bong

The trouble with posts like these is I start in on it and I'm sick of them halfway through. Then, instead of any really creative haiku, we end up with me using the word "bong" seven times to round it up. Is anybody even reading this far at this point? I'm thinking most everybody's just scanning for rumors.

summary haiku
seemed like a good idea
but i'm done with it

Better to cut my losses before we get too far with this. Try something else with the next post.