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Padres trading all the Pretty Boys?

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Just think when there was a poll last season of the hottest Padres there were too many choices.  The ladies of Gaslamp didn't know what to do with all the magnificient man muscle and perfectly pompous pelo.  

Maybe Sandy Alderson doesn't like all the pretty boys.  Think about it they've traded Xavier Nady, Mark Sweeney, Ramon Hernandez, Mark Loretta, Brian Lawrence and Sean Burroughs.  Those guys could all work a cover of GQ if need be.  They've replaced each and every one of these guys with ugly dudes, except Mike Cameron.   Plus they are shopping Eaton around cuz he's so good looking.

They've locked up some aging beauties like Hoffman  and Giles and took back Blum.  Those guys should keep the ladies interested for a bit.  But let's face it the ladies are only going to be able to feast their eyes on Peavy once every five days.  Whose round bulbous buttocks are they going to stare at on third base?  Vinny Castilla?  Ha!

What about the eye candy, Sandy?  I mean these are long games and especially if the offense is anything like last years, we -- err the ladies need something look at!