Matt Bush: A Day In The Life

Few can forget Matt Bush, the gifted young athlete selected first overall by the Padres in 2004. Multi-talented, Bush not only pitched and played shortstop but tried his hand at other sports as well. He dabbled in mixed martial arts before giving motorsports a try. I thought it would be interesting to see how such an elite athlete spends an average day. Unfortunately, Bush could not be reached for some reason so what follows is a wild guess/ outright fiction.

6:00am: Wake up time. Nothing starts the day like a few sets of push-ups. Any great athlete will tell you, it's important to start grinding as soon as you wake up.

6:30am: Breakfast. It's also important to have a well-balanced meal to get going. This will tide him over until lunch, as Bush sticks to a strict dietary schedule every day.

7:00am: First workout of the day. Like other noted sportsmen before him, Bush never steps foot in a gym and instead dedicates most of his time doing old school exercises such as pull-ups and the like. Iron Mike Tyson was known to follow the same regimen at one time.

8:50am: Leave for work. Bush and his co-workers head to the cabinetmaking shop... or something like that. Other vocational programs offered by Hamilton Correctional Institution include electricity and brick masonry.

12:00pm: Lunch. Sadly, Bush lost today's lunch in a game of cards last night. Looks like it's back to his cell for lukewarm ramen noodles.

1:00pm: Mail call. The following exchange takes place:
"John Andrews."
[Andrews dutifully walks forward to get his letter]
"Charles Bailey."
[Bailey dutifully walks forward to get his letter]
"Jermaine Bennett."
[Bennett dutifully walks forward to get his letter]
"Matt Bush."
[no response]
"Matt Bush."
[no response]
"Matt Bush?"
"I'M MATT F___ING BUSH!!!"

2:00pm: Rec time. HCI's website says they have sports leagues so I'm going to guess he plays softball. After three errors in the first four innings, Bush is pulled from the game by his manager, the head of the Aryan brotherhood.

3:00pm: Free time. Bush joins a handful of his fellow inmates for a few games of spades. Luckily, he fares better than the night before. Not only does he not lose his dinner tray, he walks away with three packs of ramen noodles. Livin' large.

5:00pm: Dinner. After missing lunch, he's been looking forward to this. Unfortunately, as soon as he gets his tray he is approached by his softball manager, the head of the Aryan brotherhood, who informs him "Food is for winners!" and takes his tray. Bush heads back to his cell and prepares two packages of his recent winnings.

6:00pm: Free time. Back to the card table. This time Bush isn't so lucky, losing a pack of ramen and two stamped envelopes.

7:45pm: Phone call. Bush places a collect call to his mother, asking her to put more money on his commissary account as he is running low on ramen noodles and stamped envelopes.

8:00pm: Free time. He heads back to the card table yet again. It's like he never learns or something. This time he's only down one pack of ramen when a Rays game comes on in the background. Unable to bear listening to it, he goes back to his cell and does some more push-ups.

10:00pm: Lockdown. As the lights go down, Bush pulls a scratchy blanket over his eyes and wonders where it all went wrong.

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