A Friar Line-Up for Yesterday: An ABC of Padres Immortals

Kent Horner

Where once was Ogden Nash... There now is Gaslamp Ball to satisfy that poetic urge you may be feeling.

A is for Ashby
The fastballin' Andy
Throwin' nothing but fastballs
Turned out quite a dandy

B is for Bochy
His head quite a sight
Big like a bear
One eyelash pure white

C is for Cammy
Though others may pan
Taught it's not always clear
What makes up a man

D is for Dave
Winfield of course
A Yankee for life
But a Padre by force

E is for Eric
Show if you please
A John Birch member
he feared the Commies

F is for Finley
Finest of his era
No one could replace him
Not even Rueben Rivera

G is for Gwynn
Reliable nineteen
The best there ever was
A hitting machine

H is for Hoffman
a pitcher in relief
if other closers are firemen
then he's fire chief.

I is for me
Not a well-written man
But an all time, fanatic
Incurable fan

J is for Jones
His fro under his cap
You'll hear me curse
When his sauce lands in my lap

K is for Kroc
Both Joan and Ray
Sold billions of burgers
but bought the Padres

L is for Leitner
In the shadow of Jerry
If you ask if Ted's famous
Ted would say "very!"

M is for Mark Grant
As "nicest guy" he's a shoe in
if you catch his eye
he'll ask "How you doin'?"

N is for Nate
The Padres first star
He hit the ball hard
He hit the ball far

O is for Ollie
Old School Ollie Brown
An original gangsta
A man about town

P is for Peavy
The Arm from the South
Always at his best
With chaw in his mouth

Q is for Qualcomm
Along with the Murph
Twice the World Series
And this was our turf

R is for Rollie
The mustachioed hurler
Your mustache grows bushy
While his needs a curler

S is for Santiago
Not the city in Chile
but the rookie catcher
who later played for Philly.

T is for Templeton
Shortstop at the ready
Where once was a wizard
We had our Jumpsteady

U is for you
The fairweather fan
Hopping on bandwagons
Just as fast as you can

V is for Vaughn
And Veras the Q
‘98 would not be
Without help from these two

W for Williams
Not Woody but Dick
Loud spoken was he
Did not need a stick

X is for Xavier
Nady I guess
Not much to remember
No play time to assess

Y is for Young
Standing six foot ten
He looks down on everyone
A giant among men

Z is for ZZZs
The sound when you sleep
And dream of the Padres
Sure beats counting sheep

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