I often like to call the Dodgers, "The Eighty Percenters", because all of the information I have about them tells me that 80% of them are cheaters who take banned substances to gain an edge on their opponents.
Plus, The Eighty Percenters has a nice ring to it and fits within the parlance of our times.
According to people who have access to the Eric Gagnes biography that nobody was expecting nor asked for, Gagne himself estimates that 80% of the guys he played with used HGH.
"I was intimately aware of the clubhouse in which I lived. I would say that 80 percent of the Dodgers players were consuming them," Gagne says in the book.
For those of you keeping track, Eric Gagne played for the Dodgers from the year 1999 to the year 2006, or more succinctly, the twilight years of the steroid era. A semi-random sample of the Dodgers rosters during this time would suggest, according to Gagnes numbers, that 4 out of the following 5 players took HGH.
- Adrian Beltre
- Nomar Garciaparra
- Jeff Kent
- Kevin Brown
- Andy Ashby
- Jeromy Burnitz
Is it irresponsible of me to frame it that way? It kinda feels like it is, right? But it's nothing less than what Gagne himself is saying.
In other news, no word as to whether or not Gagne has gotten over his infatuation with ridiculous facial hair, dumb looking glasses and excessive French Candian accents sprinkled throughout his name.