Apr 2, 2012; Anaheim, CA, USA; General view of a Los Angeles Dodgers batting helmet before the game against the Los Angeles Angels at Angel Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Kirby Lee/Image of Sport-US PRESSWIRE
I was reading about the Padres still not being on Time Warner, and I noticed at least one commenter saying that he's going to root for the Red Sox and his son is going to root Angels.
These are obviously not die-hard fans.
However, YOU are a die-hard fan. So let's do a thought experiment.
Let's say Magic Johnson called you up and said, "You are such a good Padres Fan. We need people like you. I'm willing to pay you money to completely abandon the Padres and become a Dodger Fan For Life."
What's your number?
JBox and I were going back and forth on this. My gut said it would have to be 8 figures. JBox's gut said $50k, I talked him down to $10k, before we discussed it more and then he brought it back over $100k.
And then, after really thinking about it, he semi-settled on $2 million.
Rules... You would have to completely abandon the Padres. Meaning, if anybody asks, or even if they don't ask, you have to willingly volunteer that you are a Dodger Fan (or however you currently refer to yourself).
Furthermore... Anything that you typically do as a Padres Fan, you must do as a Dodger Fan. Meaning, you need to watch Dodger games to the same level as you currently watch Padres games. If you comment on Gaslamp Ball multiple times a day, you need to comment on True Blue LA (or a good quivalent) multiple times a day. If you wear Padres gear, you need to throw it away and get yourself equivalent Dodger gear. You can't just stop paying attention to the Padres and then half heartedly pay attention to LA. You have to be a Fan. If you schedule an annual trip out to San Diego to watch the Padres. You're headed to LA. If you talk to friends about Padres baseball, you might have to make some new friends, or continually try to change the subject to Tommy Lasorda.
There's no, "The Padres are my second favorite team". There is only Dodgers. If you do attend a game at Petco Park, you have to randomly shout stuff like, "LET'S GO DOH-DGERS" or "MA-GIC JOHN-SON".
What's your price?
Keep in mind, if the Padres ever win the World Series, you can't switch back. You have to make a complete switch to the point that the Padres winning the World Series causes about the same amount of excitement as the Giants winning the World Series. For me personally, that meant turning off the TV before the trophy was presented and making a "bech" noise before forgetting that it ever happened.
We eventually broke it down to what an annual payment might be. Let's say we're talking money over the next 40 years. JBox and I are both 35, so that takes us into retirement and potentially a bit beyond. If your initial gut says $50k, that's $1,250 a year.
Think about that.
By my reasoning, I do so much stuff with my free time that's Padres related that it would honestly be work to just suddenly figure out how to do that as a Dodger Fan, until I learned how to truly enjoy being a Dodger Fan (if that were to ever happen).
So with that in mind, I think a $12 million number might be a tad high ($300k a year for 40 years), but I'd have to think kinda hard if it went down to $2 million ($50k a year for 40 years). Maybe not. Maybe if it actually happened, I'd jump at $1,999,999.
But I like to think I'd settle for no less than twelve.
Poll
What's the minimum amount it would take for you to completely become a Dodger Fan?
$0 to 3 figures. If it's not on TV, I'm just gonna root for whoever's on TV like a soulless automaton. (11 votes)
Four figures. I'd like to be able to put a down payment on my reasonably priced Dodger-mobile. (8 votes)
Low Five figures ($10k-$50k). I'd do it for a car and/or pay off some student loans. (15 votes)
$50k to $100k. I went to medical school and am planning on moving to LA anyway. (12 votes)
$100k to $500k. If you buy me a house in an OK neighborhood, I will paint it Dodger Blue. (12 votes)
$500k to $1M. I want a nice house, but I am willing to still work. (16 votes)
$1M to $5M. I want to get paid like a middle-manager for selling my soul. (23 votes)
$5M to $10M. I want to get paid-paid if I'm not going to be able to feel joy when the Friars win it all or bring back the brown. (27 votes)
$10M+. I can't believe you even considered this sort of thing you sellouts. (48 votes)
NOT FOR ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD. YOU PEOPLE ARE CRAZY, I HAVE NO FAMILY OBLIGATIONS AND AM INDEPENDENTLY WEALTHY. (108 votes)
280 total votes


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