Jesus Guzman had two teeth pulled on Monday, they belong in a museum

Imagine he's swollen and bloated with gauze in his mouth, instead of stern and beautiful.

See if the Padres really cared about us, the fans, the media team would have filmed a David After Dentist style video of Jesus Guzman after his surgery. But no, we just have to read about it.

UTSanDiego:

Outfielder-first baseman Jesus Guzman had two teeth extracted from the right side of his face during Monday’s day off. Guzman was in pain and is listed as day-to-day. He was unavailable to start Tuesday night.

Better yet they should have let us film it for our SBNation YouTube channel that we haven't used in weeks. WAAAAAAAH!

Anyway, remember to "keep your chompers looking awesome, brush them twice a day and floss 'em".

You know what my dream job would be? The curator of our proposed Padres Oddity Museum to be located in the Showley Candy Factory.

I would have collected Guzman's teeth and put them in the dental exhibit or along side Tony Gwynn Jr's Hammate bones. I'd only handle them a few times a day and when I did I'd wear white protective gloves, I promise.

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Gaslamp Ball

You must be a member of Gaslamp Ball to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Gaslamp Ball. You should read them.

Join Gaslamp Ball

You must be a member of Gaslamp Ball to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Gaslamp Ball. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9351_tracker