I like Big Ern because he's The Human Drum Machine. I like Chris Denorfia because he's a clutchy gamer.
So I didn't get a bunch of resolutions out in March, but here's what I got for April. We should root passionately for no logical reason. What does logic get you? It gets you the heart of a robot. We are not robots though. We are Padres fans. If there's one thing we should be good at, it's rooting for a team without any clear understanding of why.
So let's embrace that, shall we?
Resolutions after the jump...
Here are my own resolutions. Feel free to make up your own:
- Continue being a Padres Fan
- Discuss the players without referencing true logic like on FanGraphs, Baseball Prospectus, etc
- Appreciate the small sample size stuff ("At this pace, Cameron Maybin will hit 60 home runs!")
- Pick a favorite player using the logic of a 6 year old ("I like him because his hair is brown and so is mine", "I like him because he’s fat/skinny/ugly/bald/hairy like my dad", "I like him because he does those commercials for Corky’s")
- Pick another favorite player using the logic of a horny groupie ("Chiseled jaw", "Sexy butt", "Snuggly bear", "Super rich")
- Root for your favorite player(s) like they’re your own children
This should be an easy month, right?