Ok, We All See The Elephant In The Room

by MrDanielX on Jul 11, 2011 8:48 AM PDT

Its time to do something about it. I cannot stand to watch this team any more. Flashes of brilliance blended with a horror stories of epic proportions. I didn't want to believe it, but in Baseball, not all things make sense. Sometimes you have to just face the facts.

What is this fact we have to face?

We have a Jonah in our midst's! Yes, someone who has defied God and therefor is sinking our Padres ship!!! Not sure what I am talking about? Go see the Movie "Master and Commander". There is a lieutenant who is inexplicably cursed. Everything he does leads to death and horrible weather for the HMS Surprise. As soon as he jumps off the boat, the weather gets better, and they go on to kick some serious British arse.

So who is this Jonah? Who is sinking this Padres Ship? Who is this curse this cancer? Who must we be rid of before he threatens to consume us all?

via cdn.sportsoverdose.com

RYAN LUDWICK!

Ever since the Padres traded for this guy, we have been cursed. CURSED! Look, I do not think he sucks, I do not think he is a bad guy, I do not wish him ill will. I want him OFF OUR SHIP! Its inexplicable, its irrational, it makes no sense, but he must go. He must be moved to an AL team and his name must never be mentioned again. There is something about him that makes us lose games. We need him to go. Ideally in some sort of insane deal where we can get JerHair back, but I realize that is essentially impossible.

Padres are obviously a team that needs some serious chemistry to get rolling. We have good chemistry guys, we just need to to rid ourselves of Jonah. Cast him away and never look back.

We need moves Jedi. We need need to cast off Jonah, fast. Let him be an All-Star in the AL someplace... Far far away from here.

This FanPost was written by a member of the Gaslamp Ball community and does not necessarily reflect the views of the Gaslamp Ball managers or SB Nation.

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Comments

Does being cursed lower his trade value?

Or is it a Padres-specific curse?

"Who do you think wiil the replacement for Jerry Jr. Cabarra or Frederson"

by Natrone Means Business on Jul 11, 2011 9:09 AM PDT reply actions

Its Padres specific. Its our ship.

Anyone who spikes a ball after tagging out a douche like Andres Torres is OK by me.

by MrDanielX on Jul 11, 2011 9:30 AM PDT up reply actions

Well he'll be one of the first to go

to be replaced by one Kyle Blanks

Understanding is a three edged sword; your side, their side and the truth.
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by TheAxManCometh on Jul 11, 2011 9:53 AM PDT reply actions

I for one am ok with that

Despite Blanks troubles we were a good team at the start of last season. Then we sent Blanks down, sent Cabrera down, and picked up Tejada and Ludwick and suddenly things weren’t going quite as well. Coincidence?

by athletics68 on Jul 11, 2011 5:57 PM PDT up reply actions

this ship

hath many holes

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

by Hormel on Jul 11, 2011 10:01 AM PDT via mobile reply actions

But only one curse.

One Jonah. Since we traded for this man we have seen nothing but sorrows.

Anyone who spikes a ball after tagging out a douche like Andres Torres is OK by me.

by MrDanielX on Jul 11, 2011 10:20 AM PDT up reply actions

last year was lightening in a bottle

this year was poop in a bottle

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

by Hormel on Jul 11, 2011 4:05 PM PDT up reply actions

Put him in the package of Heath Bell to Boston +

Boston will become home of all Padre Expatriates. They need some decent OFs. Hell, throw in a few more positions too, they need a catcher too(Hundley). The Odog will love it there, bench player. They have allot of SP injuries as well, throw in Harang as well.

by SanDiegoKev on Jul 11, 2011 2:20 PM PDT reply actions

Do they have anything left that we want?

Anyone who spikes a ball after tagging out a douche like Andres Torres is OK by me.

by MrDanielX on Jul 11, 2011 2:53 PM PDT up reply actions

Daniel Bard and Jed Lowrie

I’ll take em

Understanding is a three edged sword; your side, their side and the truth.
Bolttalk Podcast - the Best Chargers show on the Web!

by TheAxManCometh on Jul 11, 2011 3:20 PM PDT up reply actions

Dunkin Donuts

part of the deal must be that mama dunks opens stores in SD. i would be ok with any trade that involves that.

"I suggest more bike" ~KSK

"The Red Sox and Yankees are playing as I type but I don't know who's winning because I don't watch Arena League baseball." - the genius TTG

Destroying your facts with opinions

by justdave on Jul 11, 2011 3:31 PM PDT up reply actions

I love a man with his priorities in order.

by Drama on Jul 12, 2011 8:00 AM PDT up reply actions

THIS!!

"Who do you think wiil the replacement for Jerry Jr. Cabarra or Frederson"

by Natrone Means Business on Jul 12, 2011 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions

Boston's Farm System is currently ranked 17th

I think there are a number of prospects we could get for that package. I would make them take the good, with the bad, and the ugly, one package, for prospects.

by SanDiegoKev on Jul 12, 2011 10:31 AM PDT up reply actions

addition by subtraction

blanks/norf>ludwick

by iheartyourfart on Jul 11, 2011 4:37 PM PDT reply actions

C'mon guys, it's not Ludwick. Padres hitters just don't know how to hit.

Padres starters are 5th best, the Bullpen is near the top. This is a playoff-caliber
pitching staff. The hitting and fielding are the weak links. Bartlett’s errors have
been very costly, but only because the hitters can’t get on base, advance the
runners or drive them in. A middle of the pack scoring team would be right up
there with the Giants, and the defense would be considered “good enough”.

by wegotballsley on Jul 22, 2011 9:40 AM PDT reply actions