What're you, high? The Padres should NOT give away tickets.

So people have this "great" idea that the Padres should just give away tickets to these last two games for the price of free. The reasoning is, "If the tickets are free, we can sell it out, because people will pay for free."

DUMB IDEA.

Wait... Let me reiterate...

DUMB IDEA.

Here's what I believe to be the likeliest scenario. Keep in mind that this isn't the worst case scenario, even though it actually is the worst case scenario. It is the likeliest scenario, which also is our worst case scenario.

The Padres give away 20k tickets to a single game.

19k people show up.

San Diego becomes the butt of jokes for a hundred years.

You remember Disco Demolition Night? That would have nothing on this.

People aren't showing up because the tickets are too expensive. If Padres fan doesn't want to show up because Padres Fan believes the product is still boring, that's one thing. Sure that's an acceptable, if shit, reason.

If Padres don't want to show up because it's such a pain in the ass to get in and out of Petco Park (even though 65k+ people will wait a total of 4 hours to get in and out of a Charger game), then sure... Padres Fan is lazy.

BUT....

If Padres Fan doesn't show up because it's playoff atmosphere baseball and they've been given a ticket for FREE, then we would never hear the end of it. We would replace Local Braves Fan as the most un-clutch fans in sports,

"Whale's Vagina sucks so much ass that they couldn't sell out a free game."

You KNOW it's true. Once people get a hold of a free ticket, do they go to use the free ticket? Sometimes. SOMETIMES. GIVING AWAY FREE TICKETS DOESN'T GUARANTEE PEOPLE IN THE STANDS.

Second likeliest scenario. Free tickets over the last two games. TOURIST HEAVEN.

"Whale's Vagina sucks so much ass that they gave away tickets to THE OTHER TEAM'S FANS."

How is this a good idea? It's the worst idea in the history of bad ideas. TERRIBLE TERRIBLE IDEA.

Just show up to the game tonight, Padres Fan. Pay the money. As it is, the tickets are basically half off anyway. You don't need them to be free. You need to pay the money so that your money is where your mouth is.

DON'T BE A TOURIST. DON'T BE A WHALE'S VAGINA. QUIT COMING UP WITH SHIT IDEAS WHILE YOU ARE HIGH.

GO PADRES.