An open letter from Dave Winfield on the importance of not getting trashed at prom

by Dex on Jan 27, 2009 9:32 AM PST

Listen kids.

I know that you think it's "cool" to get "smashed" with your friends at "prom" or "graduation". That's why I'm sending you this message. Don't do it!

The only good thing that's ever come out of using lots of "dope" and drinking lots of the "booze" is an artificially inflated self-esteem and the increased possibility of casual sex, which you may enjoy, but you also may regret. Is that what you want your life to be? Answer me!

Your friend,

Dave Winfield

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Yet again

he forgets his time with the Padres and decides to market himself and his message using the Yankees.

DISGRACE!!!!!!!

Don't hate the game, hate the nerds!

by thenerdhater on Jan 27, 2009 11:29 AM PST reply actions

Dave,

You don’t have to wait for prom or drug me, you can take me any time.

Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony making a gift for you? ◔ヮ◔
Uncommon Sportsman :: Absurdity in play

by Axion on Jan 27, 2009 11:37 AM PST reply actions

Funny stuff...

I just imagine most “kids” asking “who the f is Dave Winfield?”

"Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana"
Groucho Marx

by planetjeffy on Jan 27, 2009 7:56 PM PST reply actions

Isn't this from like

When the earth was cooling?

"Football is a physical sport, sometimes you have a disagreement on what's going on, and you have a discussion about it." Kris Dielman

by Brian (DaBolts) on Jan 27, 2009 8:11 PM PST up reply actions

Obviously

he doesn’t know how good it is to be completly hammered. I just finished my exams and I went for a couple of drinks. Life is just a lot of fun when you had a couple of drinks, no commercial can proove me otherwise…

by sixpakfrombelgium on Jan 28, 2009 11:11 AM PST reply actions