Wiggins knows Hoffman is a legend and all, but let you and Wiggins face it here, people, the guy sucks these days. He has no heat and when he comes into the game, you know the other team is like "Oh sweet!" When HELL'S BELLS starts to play, it's like a signal that batting practice is starting. Even Iguchi and Greene and their low-200s batting averages get jealous because they think "Aw man, now the other team has opportunities to get hits. Hoffman is the easy batting average boost."

But don't take Wiggins' word for it. Here to speak his mind in his own words is Trevor Hoffman. Take it away, Trevor.

Hello Gaslampball. Trevor Hoffman here. Trevor knows he sucks now. Why hasn't Trevor retired yet? Trevor likes the ligths and flash that comes with Trevor's closing opportunities. Trevor might blow saves, but saves get Trevor blows. Whoa, look out! That's all for now. Trevor out.

OK, Wiggins is back. Hi. So Trevor sucks, guys. Wiggins would rather have freaking Kouz on the mound than Trevor. Dear Bud Black: DON'T BRING TREVOR IN ANY LONGER. PS: BUD BLACK YOU SUCK TOO. NICE SMILE. YOU AND KHALIL SHOULD HANG OUT AND DO ZOOLANDER FACES ALL DAY.

Now Wiggins goe die. Wiggins ahte life stupid Padres can't win WHY DID WISGH WASTE HOURS WATCHINGG THAT SLHLTUPID GAME!!!!!!?????