So I was watching the Cubs series and I was looking at that ivy on the Wrigley Field outfield walls. I decided we needed something like that, except ivy is lame. So I tried to think of what a good San Diego thing would be. At first I thought of the Palm Trees, but became a little bored thinking about that. What's a good San Diego plant? What about kelp? Yeah kelp!

So here's what you do, get some of that real thick glass and put that up in the outfield and make the outfield walls like an aquarium.  Since this is Petco Park why not throw some fish in there too.  Then a light bulb went off in my head.  We shouldn't stuff just any fish in there, we should stuff the world's biggest fish in there, Shamu!  

San Diego is the home of Sea World, I'm sure they've got plenty of extra Shamus.  The problem is the walls would only be about 6 ft wide, so once you stuffed Shamu in there he wouldn't be able to turn around.  So he'd swim from Left field to Right field and then get stuck in the corner since he can't swim backwards.  

So I decided that every time a Padre player hits a home run you get this crane and you attach it to Shamu's tail and you pull him all the way back to left field again.  The kids would love this.  There's nothing kids like more than baseball, shamu fish and construction equipment.

Somebody call the Padres, let's make this happen.

Update [2007-6-19 14:3:16 by jbox]:

I emailed Sea World to get further information about Shamu, to see if this would be possible:

Then I became concerned about the upkeep of having a Shamu at the ballpark.