Your Las Vegas correspondent, teemcee here.  I submit the following report to my fellow Gaslamp Ballers:

I recently had the opportunity to observe both Adam Eaton and Sean Burroughs as the Padres Triple A Minor League affiliate, the Portland Beavers, made the trip to Las Vegas to "play" the Las Vegas 51s, the Dodger affiliate.  I say "play" because the 51s are the Pacific Coast League equivalent of the Kansas City Royals.  Sure, there's guys with uniforms and gloves and all that but I'm not convinced that any of them have ever played the game of baseball.  But I digress....

We attended the Saturday night game in the four-game series.  There was a smattering of Padres fans in the crowd.  Mostly it was ignorant baseball "fans" with a few scattered strippers and drunk yahoos trying to talk to the strippers.  (This is VEGAS after all).  51s tickets are very easy to come by these days.  We were approximately 10 rows behind home plate.  Did I mention they're horrible?  

I would estimate that at least 50% of the attendees were there to pick up a Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman bobblehead doll.  You know things are bad when you give away bobbleheads of people who have absolutely nothing to do with your team.  Mayor Goodman seemed semi-sober when he threw out the first pitch.  Sadly, the bobblehead had Mayor Goodman holding a baseball instead of a martini.

Apparently, this was Adam Eaton's final minor league start and he looked good.  I think Adam pitched six innings.  His body language indicated that he did not feel the pain in his finger that had previously sidelined him.  The pelo was "Wild and Crazy Adam".  He seemed to be throwing mostly fastballs.  I saw him throw one curveball in the first couple of innings.  Once he seemed "warmed up" there were some more curveballs.  The 51s batters were mystified.  It may have been Adam's stuff or maybe they have never practiced hitting curveballs.  But I digress (again)....

Sean has a new haircut.  At first, I didn't even recognize him with his hat off.  Sean won't be showing much pelo anytime soon.  His head is prickly.  Sean went 3-for-4, I think.  No home runs for Sean in this game.  There was an article about Sean in today's (Tuesday) Las Vegas Review-Journal.  It mostly talked about his Little League glory (NOTE TO BASEBALL WRITERS:  That horse is dead.  Please stop beating it.) and his thoughts on coming back to the minor leagues.  You know things are bad when the local newspaper covers the other team's players instead.

The Beavers won.  The final score was 14-3 or something ridiculous.  I hoped the umpire would invoke the 10-run mercy rule but sadly, no, he had to let them play the entire game.  The game lasted about six hours (I might be exaggerating, but only a little.)  They gave away loaves of bread after the game.

I attempted to conduct interviews with both Adam and Sean after the game but I was thwarted by the teenage security personnel employed at Cashman Field.  Next time I'll remember to bring the latest editions of "Teen Cosmo" and 2-for-1 coupons to Hooters as payola.

Vegas correspondent, teemcee, signing off...